Unmentionable
by Emiliana Keladry
Summary: Do we shoot it?" Maybe Malcolm shouldn't ever leave the ship. My entry for Drown Malcolm Month.
1. Chapter 1

**Unmentionable**

**Summary:**_ "Do we shoot it?" Maybe Malcolm shouldn't ever leave the ship. My entry for Drown Malcolm Month._

By Emiliana Keladry

**Setting:** During the second season, after "Minefield" and "Dead stop"

**Pairings:** None

**Genre:** Friendship/humor

**Author's note:** Sorry that this is a little late! I hope that you can forgive me. I think that you'll like this "Drown Malcolm Month" entry. Please let me know what you thought! :) And Poohdog, I'll try to have no Mal/Hoshi in this story, but you know me. ;)

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Sticky and hot, muggy and disgusting; this planet was not his taste. Sweat dripped down Lieutenant Malcolm Reed's back and drenched the front of his uniform. If they hadn't detected that strange component that Commander Tucker wanted to examine and take samples of, they might have skipped this section of the planet. It was completely jungle and it wasn't even possible to see the sky through the tree tops, but it was warm none the less. Malcolm wiped sweat from his brow and followed after Trip as he did the same motion. Captain Jonathan Archer and Sub-commander T'Pol were a few feet ahead of them, observing a plant. The closest science team was about a mile away. The tall yellow and blue trees were swaying in a slight breeze towards the top that the crew below couldn't feel. The intense heat felt like hell.

"Can't you relax for a few minutes? Nothing is going to hurt us on an uninhabited planet," Trip teased, taking a picture of him.

"Sorry Commander," Malcolm responded, giving him a tight lipped smile.

They walked slowly around in the forest, pushing past branches that snapped them in the faces. Twice Malcolm had to catch his balance after a branch had almost knocked him over. Trip took a swig of water and offered some to Malcolm.

"You thirsty?"

"I'm fine."

The group continued deeper into the jungle. Malcolm glanced over to see that Captain Archer was taking a drink of water and resting while looking at a flower growing upon the side of the yellow tree. The group kept walking around until they were around a big body of water. It was the edge of a lake and the perimeter of the area that the team was checking. Malcolm kept his eyes turned away from the water. Thick reeds poked up from the surface. On the edges it didn't look deep, but his scanner told him that it went down fifteen meters at the deepest point. Spongy grass and a dark purplish moss were growing around the edges. It was a disgusting sight. The still water chilled Malcolm's entire body and he kept his eyes away from the water in an attempt to not have a panic attack. Trip was inspecting a small bug that he found and was showing it to T'Pol.

"Having fun?" Captain Archer asked, using his eyes to motion to the surroundings.

"Of course."

Jonathan knew about his aqua phobia, something Malcolm wished he could take back. It was uncomfortable to be close to the water, but it could be worse.

"How are you doing?" he questioned, lowering his voice so the other two didn't hear him.

"I'm fine," Malcolm replied, letting the lie slip past his mouth.

Captain Archer gave him a skeptical look before walking over to talk with T'Pol about something. Malcolm glanced back at the water again, not liking that he couldn't see his enemy. Suddenly, the ground began to shake, causing Malcolm to fall back a few steps. He could see Trip catch T'Pol as the planet continued to move. Malcolm attempted to move forward away from the water, but the shaking was moving him backwards. After a long minute, it stopped. Malcolm placed a hand on his chest, drawing in a shaky breath. He only had a second to relax, seeing that Captain Archer and the others were okay, getting to their feet. The mossy ground sank beneath his feet and a small sound escaped his lips.

"Malcolm!" Jonathan yelled, turning in slow motion.

There was a splash as Malcolm fell into the water. The surface water sucked him under into the deep part of the lake. He couldn't draw in any oxygen before he was submerged in his nightmare. Trip ran past Archer, getting to the edge first. There was no sight of Lieutenant Reed under the water. It was still.

"Where is he?" Trip demanded.

"Malcolm!" Jonathan exclaimed.

"Why isn't he coming up?"

"Maybe he cannot swim," the captain muttered to himself.

Trip stripped off his boots and socks, and then jumped into the water. Jonathan did the same, leaping in after him. T'Pol waited for long moments on the surface and neither man emerged with Malcolm in tow. Jonathan came up first, gasping and searching for the surface. T'Pol knelt down closer, extending her hand as Jon came to the edge. She helped him onto the spongy moss as he spat out the stuff in his lungs.

"I couldn't find him," Archer coughed.

A second later, Trip burst to the surface, coughing and struggling to hold onto an unconscious Lieutenant Reed. Malcolm wasn't moving or even attempting to rid his body of the alien water and whatever microscopic things were in the gunk. Jonathan helped Trip pulled Malcolm onto the bank of the lake and Trip threw up the remaining liquid in his stomach. Malcolm's face was pale and his lips had turned blue. Mud and moss stuck to his soaked uniform.

"Come on Malcolm! Breathe!" Archer ordered, placing hands on the man's shoulders.

There was no response. The Captain began doing compressions on Malcolm's chest, hoping to jar his heart and get him to draw in oxygen. T'Pol pulled out her communicator and began to hail Enterprise, only receiving static in response. Trip checked Malcolm's pulse, finding it weak and erratic. Enterprise still didn't response. Jonathan realized that he was going to have to do mouth-to-mouth to help Malcolm breathe. But before he could sacrifice his lips, Malcolm turned his head and began to retch. Trip helped him turn enough so he could empty his stomach and clear out his lungs. His head dropped in relief as he heard Malcolm breathing heavily. At least he was getting air now, though he was still unconscious. At that moment… Trip saw It. He jumped back slightly, causing Jonathan to give him a strange look.

"Trip?" he murmured.

A long slimy creature, no longer than six inches, was attached to Malcolm. It appeared to have bitten right above… well, Malcolm's crotch. Jonathan saw what Trip was looking at and gasped.

"Do we shoot it?" Trip asked frantically.

"We might hit… no… get a stick T'Pol."

"Are you going to stab it?" Trip demanded to know as T'Pol went in search of a suitable stick. "Couldn't that be worse if you miss?"

"Well, I'm not sticking my hand there!"

T'Pol returned with a sharp branch that had fallen in the ground tremor. Jonathan took a deep breath and reached out with the stick, praying that he wouldn't miss.

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**TO BE CONTINUED...**

_Please review! Thanks!_

_Emma_


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: Enterprise belongs to ParaMount, not me.**

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**Chapter 2**

Just as Jonathan reached out to poke the creature, the thing stopped biting Malcolm and slid back into the water, barely disturbing the surface. Trip breathed a sigh of relief, letting his face fall into his hands and rubbing his face. T'Pol took out her communicator since the other two had ruined their communicators in the lake. Jonathan suddenly gasped, causing Trip to uncover his eyes. The captain held his breath as he realized that the thing had bitten through Malcolm's uniform and blood was staining the dark fabric.

"T'Pol to Enterprise," she hailed calmly.

"Mayweather," Travis responded.

"Mr. Reed has been critically injured, we need an emergency transport."

"The transporter is offline and Commander Tucker said before he left that it wouldn't be working for a while."

"Understood," T'Pol answered, closing her communicator.

Captain Archer rubbed his hands in his face. It never worked when they needed it, hopefully someone would perfect that someday. Malcolm groaned, bringing Jonathan back to the present. He had to do something to get the younger man medical attention. The med kit was in the shuttle, almost two miles away. They would have to carry him there, but the humidity was too much for them. They could easily over-heat or pass out from exhaustion in this heat. The injured man moaned again and Jon saw T'Pol place a hand on his forehead.

"His body temperature is slightly elevated. Captain, we need to get him back to the ship as soon as possible."

"We'll have to carry him," Jon announced.

"If we could wake him, it might be a bit easier for him to help us," Trip suggested.

Jonathan gave Malcolm's shoulder a light shove. His eyes remained closed and he only continued to breathe heavily. Jonathan tried again, but his friend wouldn't wake up.

"It's probably better that he doesn't wake up and panic," he finally decided. "Let's get him up."

Trip and Jonathan both put an arm under one of Malcolm's arms, hauling him to his feet. Mr. Reed groaned, but stayed unconscious. T'Pol picked up the bag with their samples and they began the journey to the shuttle pod. The ground was full of twisted roots sticking up from the trees and areas when the soil was lower, causing holes and for the two men to lose their footings a few times. T'Pol moved to the lead, looking for places that were easier for them to walk. Malcolm's body threatened to slip from their arms several times and they could barely hold him up. They had been walking for almost twenty minutes when Jonathan fell to his knees. Trip grabbed Malcolm before he smacked his head on a tree branch. They didn't need to add concussion to his list of injuries.

"Cap'n, are you okay?" Trip asked, gasping as he lowered Malcolm to the ground.

"I'm alright. I just need a little rest," Jonathan said between deep breaths. "This heat is worse than I thought."

"The temperature has risen by six degrees in the last twenty minutes. It appears that the temperature during the suns highest point penetrates the tundra and quickly warms the area," T'Pol relayed.

She passed them each a water bottle. Trip took a long drink and then glanced down at Malcolm, seeing the sweat dripping from his forehead. T'Pol knelt down and felt his forehead. His body temperature had risen in again and infection from the wound was setting in. Jonathan and Trip stood up, picking up their friend to carry him. They both refused to give up as the sweat soaked their uniforms and dripped from the ends of their hair. Even T'Pol looked like she was beginning to feel the humidity. The group was almost to the shuttle-pod when Jonathan tripped again, staggering under Malcolm's weight.

"Let me carry him, Cap'n. We're almost there and you're exhausted."

Jonathan nodded, letting T'Pol help him stand up. Trip considered letting Malcolm be carried on his shoulder, but he didn't want to bump the wound. He put one arm under his friend's knees and tossed Malcolm's arm over his shoulder to lift him. With a groan he stood up and began moving towards the shuttle again. It was soon visible through the branches. Trip struggled to keep Malcolm in his grasp as his arms began to shake from exhaustion. T'Pol opened the door to the shuttle, assisting Captain Archer and then climbing in. Trip passed Malcolm to his superior officer and climbed in after, pulling the door closed. He collapsed onto his butt, taking deep breathes. T'Pol powered up the shuttle, turning on the air-conditioning to cool them all down.

"How is he?" Trip asked. He took a swig of water and watched as the captain took out the medical kit, scanning Malcolm.

"His body temperature is 103.5. We need to cool him down."

The shuttle pod lifted off the surface as Jonathan wet a cloth bandage from the medical kit and began to sponge Malcolm's face and neck. Trip removed Malcolm's arms from his uniform.

"T'Pol to Enterprise."

"Mayweather, how's it going?"

"We are headed back to the ship; inform Doctor Phlox to meet us in the shuttle bay."

"Understood."

Trip concentrated on taking care of Malcolm as the shuttle rushed back to Enterprise. His friend was breathing heavily and sweat still dripped from his forehead, no matter their attempts to cool him down. Jonathan was resting on the floor with his back again the shuttle wall. His eyes were closed and his face was pale from exhaustion. Trip passed him a bottle of water, forcing him to drink it.

"Thanks," Jonathan mumbled.

He looked terrible. Trip looked anxiously at T'Pol as Enterprise came into view and they began their docking procedure. Phlox's voice came over the com when T'Pol opened the shuttle door inside. T'Pol helped Jonathan stand up and they started towards the decon chamber. Trip put his arms under Malcolm and lifted him up, trying to control his worry when he felt how warm Malcolm was. His body temperature was dangerously high.

"I suggest that you get clean in the showers. I'm giving you something that will lower Mr. Reed's temperature," Phlox declared. "I'd also like a blood sample from him."

Trip took the hypo-spray and injected the medicine into Malcolm's neck. He made no sound and didn't regain consciousness. He turned his head slightly in response to the blood sample. Trip passed it back through the window to Phlox. He turned to see that between the two showers, they might have some problems. He was exhausted and Captain Archer wasn't much better. T'Pol was the only that hadn't been effected by the planet. She had already begun undressing Jonathan down to his Starfleet blues and helping him into the shower. Jonathan was uncomfortable, but he wasn't resisting. Trip didn't take another thought, but proceeded to help Malcolm into the shower. He had to help his friend, even if this was someplace that no friend wanted to go.

When Trip finished showering, he dressed in the sick bay pajamas and helped Malcolm pulled them on. The lieutenant was a bit more lucid after the cold water hit him, but he still wasn't fully aware of what was going on. His pulse was erratic and his face was tremendously pale.

"I've analyzed the scans that T'Pol took of the creature and I'm working on an antidote to the toxin in Mr. Reed's bloodstream. I'll meet you in sick bay," Phlox announced.

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_Sorry for the long delay! I hope that you enjoyed this chapter, please review! Thanks!_

_Emma_


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own Enterprise, it belongs ParaMount.**

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**Chapter 3**

Water was rushing over his head and he couldn't see. The murky liquid filled his lungs as he tried to breathe. The suction pulled him deeper, ruining his efforts to get to the surface and to draw in oxygen. It felt as if someone was holding him down and he couldn't escape. Malcolm was drowning. Before he lost consciousness, it felt like something bit him. The pain went numb as the world spun and he couldn't remember anything else. He was going to die by drowning, just like in his nightmares as a child.

Malcolm sat up quickly, letting the fear pour out of him. Everything was silent and the lighting was low. He was in sickbay and it must have been the middle of the night. He could hear someone coughing nearby which brought him to more awareness. The lieutenant was not the only person in sickbay at the time. Looking around, he saw that the two beds beside him were occupied by Captain Archer and Commander Tucker. Both were awake and didn't look very well. Jonathan coughed into his arm again, sighing afterwards. It wasn't how the situation normally looked after waking up in sickbay. Malcolm didn't feel any pain and his friends looked like death warmed over.

"Sir?" Malcolm whispered, speaking to Captain Archer.

"Malcolm, it's good to see you awake," Jonathan answered with a smile.

"What's happening right now?"

"Ah, it's good to see you awake Lieutenant," Doctor Phlox greeted, emerging from one of his various hiding places. "You've been out for quite a while."

Trip was up on one elbow, giving his Malcolm a smile between coughing. The doctor quickly insisted that he lay back down, checking the vitals above his bio-bed. Malcolm was now quite confused on what was happened.

"What happened down there after the earthquake?" Malcolm inquired.

"You fell into the water and we jumped in after you didn't come up," Jonathan answered. "Once we got you out of the water, we noticed that…" The captain cleared his throat, suddenly looking uncomfortable.

"Tell him," Trip muttered.

"A creature bit you… right above…" Jonathan attempted to continue.

"There's no need to worry," Phlox added, seeing Malcolm's face of horror. "The creature didn't harm your genitals and I removed the toxin that was in your system. I'd like to monitor you for a few more hours and then you'll be free to return to your quarters for addition rest."

"You're luckier than us," Trip muttered before going into a coughing fit.

Doctor Phlox gave Commander Tucker a sip of water and helped him lie back down. Malcolm was confused. Though he was sure he was full of Phlox's special mixture, he didn't feel terrible. Captain Archer and Trip looked horrible compared to him. He should have been in the worse off. Phlox checked on Jonathan's vitals, giving him a hypo-spray to the neck.

"Why are you here?" Malcolm asked.

"Well, it turns out that there was a microbe in the water that's giving us pneumonia like symptoms. The creature that bit you gave you immunity to the microbe," Trip complained, looking exhausted.

"I'm working on an antidote, based on the toxin that the creature injected into your bloodstream," Phlox answered. "They'll be feeling better in no time. You best get back to sleep now."

Phlox turned the lights down a little lower, pulling the curtain as he prepared to get back to work. Jonathan closed his eyes, trying to hold back a cough.

"It's good to have you back," the captain murmured.

Malcolm closed his eyes, smiling a little. This was an interesting change of circumstances, even though he did get bitten near the genitals.

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Doctor Phlox released Malcolm to his quarters the next morning after informing him that he was to rest and come back in the afternoon for a check-up and bandage change. He rested most of the morning, after taking a shower to wash that sickbay smell from his skin. It reminded him of visiting the doctor as a kid, smelling like medicine and sterilization. Malcolm returned in the afternoon, smiling slightly at the sight of Trip and Captain Archer sitting up in their bio-beds, coughing. Phlox was administering medication to both of them as they grimaced.

"Ah, Lieutenant, how are you feeling?" Phlox greeted.

"Better. How are your patients?"

"I've developed a cure to their respiratory illness and they'll be free to leave tomorrow. I'd like to monitor them for a little longer. You're welcome to visit with them before I check your wound."

Blushing, Malcolm approached his superiors with a grin on his face. Trip gave him a smile as he walked over. Captain Archer coughed into his hand, blinking feverish eyes.

"How are you feeling?" Jonathan inquired.

"I'm fine, sir."

"How're the family jewels?" Trip teased. "You should have seen the captain. He was gonna poke a stick at the creature. Can't imagine what that might have done if he missed."

"Well… I'm glad that he didn't have to impale the creature so close to…" Malcolm cleared his throat, looking around uncomfortably. "I actually wanted to apologize for putting your lives in danger because of my fall into the water. You didn't have to jump in to rescue me."

Trip suppressed a laugh, getting a glare from Malcolm. "Of course we had to jump in to save you. You'd do the same for us. Besides, who else could keep Muller and the others in check? They'd be blowing up half the ship without you. Captain Archer might have a mutiny if we left you in that murky swamp."

Malcolm nodded, showing his thanks without words. Phlox came over at that moment, ready to change Malcolm's bandage. The man blushed, hanging his head as the doctor ushered him behind a curtain. It was quick and painless. Phlox announced that it would heal nicely, not leaving any scar. He suggested that Malcolm get some more rest and return one more time for him to check it out. Phlox moved the curtain back and Mr. Reed prepared to head to the mess hall for something to eat before retiring to his quarters to read and relax. Trip wasn't quite ready to let him leave without a little teasing.

"Hey, Phlox… can I ask you a medical question?" Trip asked with a funny look on his face.

"Of course, Commander."

"It's about size…"

"Ah, would this be a question regarding human male's fascination with size, more commonly called penis envy?"

All the blood drained from Malcolm's face as Trip burst out laughing. Jonathan covered his face with his hand, barely concealing his smile. The Denobulan seemed unaffected by the content of the question and Malcolm silently prayed that he wouldn't use his phrase about watching. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to hear the answer to Trip's question.

"I'm afraid I cannot answer that question Commander," Phlox responded calmly. "I don't have a clear basis for comparison. You'll have to live with the idea of not knowing."

Malcolm walked to the doors of sickbay, completely embarrassed that Trip had asked that question. His friend was still laughing to himself as Phlox encouraged him to lie back down so not to agitate his condition further. Jonathan was saying something to him that Malcolm couldn't hear and wasn't sure he wanted to hear. Stopping in front of the door, he smiled and turned around.

"Trip," he said with laughter in his voice.

Trip looked over at him, confused.

"Just in case you were wondering, there's no competition. You wouldn't win."

The engineer's jaw dropped slightly before he started laughing along with Jonathan. Phlox gave one of his huge creepy smiles.

"Umm… good to know," Trip returned.

"Don't mention it," Malcolm answered and turned to quickly leave sick bay before Trip could ask any more questions.

**THE END**

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_Sorry for the delay! Hope you enjoyed it! Please leave a last review!_

_Emma_


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